When the Wolfbane Blooms

Another Smut4Nerds Story by Arnold Snyder

To Dustin Cathcart, werewolves weren’t just another Hollywood fiction. Werewolves were his business.

As founder and CEO of Lupine Solutions, LLC, he had access to a database of more than 1300 werewolves nationwide, available to him for any and all werewolf needs. He could provide bona fide werewolf services to individuals, small businesses, and major corporations.

Using the formulas developed by internationally-acclaimed lupinologist Dr. Dolphus Vanschtubenbergh, Dustin could now transform any man, woman, or child into a werewolf, without so much as a full moon.

The only problem—he couldn’t think of a damn thing anyone could possibly use a werewolf for. They were clumsy, rude, antisocial, and they smelled bad. They wouldn’t obey orders, they sometimes ate people’s pets, and on occasion developed a taste for human flesh.

But Dustin wasn’t going to let those impediments to his dream get in the way of business, especially not after he joined forces with Bridget Baskervilles, who was not only a con artist extraordinaire, but the sexiest babe in Strait City.

When the Wolfbane Blooms is the story of a nice midwestern boy who teams up with a nice midwestern girl to foster his lifelong dream of a world populated by nice midwestern werewolves.

If you want to read When the Wolfbane Blooms for free, click here.

If you want to buy When the Wolfbane Blooms on Amazon (a thoughtful gift if you have a friend with a perverse sense of humor), click here.

See also other Smut4Nerds classics: Pink Wedge, here,
and Transplant, here.

Print Friendly

Transplant

A New Novel by Arnold Snyder — Another Smut4Nerds Classic

He was a plant trapped in a man’s body.

She was a woman trapped in a plant’s body.

Theirs was a love like the world had never known.

They called themselves transplants and for years they suffered in silence. But with a courage hitherto unseen in the annals of botany, they rose up to demand their rights.

Transplant is a story of love and betrayal, heroism and photosynthesis, the story of tomorrow’s headlines today.

If you want to read Transplant for free, click here.

To purchase Transplant at Amazon, 2.99/Kindle or 8.99 paperback (a thoughtful gift if you have a friend with a perverse sense of humor), click here.

See also: Pink Wedge, yet another Smut4Nerds Classic, here.

Print Friendly

Smut4Nerds: Dirty Books on My Terms

Arnold Snyder's Pink Wedge
FREE SMUT! (see below)

by Arnold Snyder

My professional writing career began in 1972 when Greenleaf Classics, a big-time smut publisher, rejected a crazy sex story I’d submitted but put me in contact with an agent who provided me with Greenleaf’s formula sheets, which described the stories the editors would accept.

Unlike the manuscript I’d submitted, the accepted formulas were humorless, predictable, and repetitious, with little wiggle room for creative fun. But although commercial smut wasn’t artistically rewarding, it paid well. My wife and I could churn out a 40,000-word manuscript in a week and it paid $510 (after our agent took his 15% off the top). That was decent pay for a week’s work in the early 70s, especially considering the loose working conditions. For perspective: Our two-bedroom apartment in Berkeley was $190/mo.

I have no way of measuring what our hourly pay might have been. How do you measure your work hours when both of you are working all day, every day, until you finish cranking out the required word count? But during this time you are laying around in your underwear with the radio tuned to jazz or acid rock, chain-drinking coffee, chain smoking, taking breaks to get high and ponder the universe, yakking about who knows what, and f*cking like crazy?

There was a fun factor to writing smut together, even horrible, trite, repetitious smut . . .  Continue reading Smut4Nerds: Dirty Books on My Terms

Print Friendly